Friday, April 08, 2005


277) Space Jam. Had I known about the featuring of Jordan's time with the Barons AND Bill Murray's presence, I would have watched this a long time ago.

DST has struck again. It's going to be weeks before my sleep patterns get back to normal, so I'm sure I'm going to be losing time by fall asleep in the middle of movies for awhile. I'm watching Memphis Belle right now but I don't know if I'll finish it before I fall asleep again.

277 down, 723 to go.

John Quincy Adams Update

Still dead.


275) The Snapper. So great. I absolutely love The Commitments and when I watched The Van earlier this year I absolutely loved it, so I'm glad I got to watch this too. Come next year, I'm going to start reading Roddy Doyle's books because the movies are brilliant.

276) Phenomenon. I gave this a shot because of Robert Duvall, and I guess he was good, but for the most part this wasn't so hot. There were a few too many "cutesy" moments (anything with more than three musical montages is bound to be trouble) and there wasn't any real reason to care for the characters. The script just set it up like Travolta is the good guy so root for him because you are supposed to. I don't know, it just seemed like a waste.

276 down, 724 to go.

Blogger is pissing me off. I blame DST, which is still causing me to fall asleep too late and feel like hell in the morning because my body thinks it should still be in bed when it is, in fact, walking into work. I hate you DST.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

...big green eyes that look like, son...

...they can see every cheap thing that you ever done...

I just took the Desperate Housewives quiz and it turns out that my ideal love match is, in fact, Bree. Apparently I "...lack discipline, and this put-together homemaker is just the one to provide it. Like it or not [my] shirts will be starched, [my] toast buttered for [me] and maybe even a mint left on [my] pillow." Why is Bree not real, and also my wife? Life is SO unfair...

Wednesday, April 06, 2005


273) In the Cut. Okay, this was just dirty and stupid. Meg, you might be trying to shed your "cute" image but going from cute to full on dirty is the wrong way to do it. And Ruffalo was so shady that it's hard to believe anyone would want to bed him, much less a conservative English teacher. This was just one tawdry sex scene after another that served absolutely no purpose. Terrible.

274) My Life Without Me. Robin is here, and I could totally write a bunch of mean things about her, but she would still be happy about that because she wants attention. She cried. I probably would have too if I had human emotions, but luckily I don't.

274 down, 726 to go.

P.S. I still hate DST. DIE DST! DIE!

Special Note to Jana

It has come to my attention that your feelings are hurt because I never responded to your comment about Lolita or whatever, so sorry about that. I didn't really think it needed a response, but I figured if you got your feelings hurt I should say something, and also it is totally pissing off Robin that you get a special note and she doesn't.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005


Words cannot express my utter disgust with daylight saving's time. I didn't sleep for shit last night and kept waking up all confused about the time and today has sucked and now I'm tired as hell and since I fell asleep in the middle of Ugetsu it took forever to watch it and now I won't sleep well again tonight and I hate daylight saving's time and I hope it dies! DIES! ANGER!!!!

271) Ugetsu. I don't know about one of the greatest films ever made. There were several times when all I could think was "sweet Godzilla, can we please advance the story for a little while?", there are least three Kurosawa's alone that are way better than this and that's just Japanese cinema, and the whole ghost angle was just weird. The beginning was great, but by about the one hour mark it started getting strange and then all of a sudden it was like everything was tied up a little too conveniently and very abruptly. I got the point, but it left me very disatisfied. Whatever.

272) Northfork. I'm usually of the opinion that anything with James Woods can't be that bad so even though this sounded kind of weird I decided to give it a shot and I'm glad I did. It was, in fact, kind of weird and quite fantastic but it was also engaging and I found myself really involved in the storyline. Weird, but totally worth it.

272 down, 728 to go.

Monday, April 04, 2005


...and if your head explodes from dark forebodings too...

Do you know how much I hate daylight saving's time? Do you really? Because I really hate it and I doubt you can know the depths of my hatred. Many have seen the shallow waters of my hatred, a select few have glimpsed the terrors waiting a few more yards off shore, and even fewer still have witnessed the horror that lay just beyond the continental shelf, but none have seen the evil that lies in the unfathomable deep where my hatred for daylight saving's time resides. I had a whole long entry on it and all of the many individual hatreds I developed on my way to work this morning that included a delightful anecdote about a mysterious white Corolla that never seemed to go more than 20 MPH but kept appearing ahead of me (it even involved a clever Back to the Future II reference) and the strange case of the Pontiac Bonneville with neither a rear or front windshield, but then blogger screwed it all up and it's now lost and so my hatred for Blogger also burns in the evil depths of my hatred like the bioluminescent bulb of a deep sea fish. It's all daylight savings time's fault! If I ever meet Ben Franklin I am so going to kick his ass for coming up with such a stupid idea.

268) The Barbarian and the Geisha. I did finish it last night and it was a good historical drama. I'm pretty sure John Huston liked movies like this so he could shoot on location and get paid for taking exotic vacations.

269) Shock Treatment. This was so wild! Why is it not on DVD? I would totally buy it! Definetely a studio B picture that was supposed to be all shocking and scandalous but it just turned out AWESOME! And Carol Lynley was absolutely gorgeous so that's just one more plus.

270) Panic in the Streets. I kind of feel obligated to like Elia Kazan for naming names before the HUAC. I mean, fuck the commies. But more than that this was an excellent picture and one more off the film noir list so it's a win win.

270 down, 730 to go.

Random Thoughts:
1) Jiminy Freaking Christmas, what the hell is wrong with the French?

2) Possible candidates for next year's grand undertaking include: Learning Russian, remaining indoors for an entire year, and building a sailboat. I'm pretty sure I'll be learning Russian.

3) I thought trying to watch 1000 movies was an ill conceived plan but it's the acme of sanity compared to the stupid idea of not cutting my hair for six months. It's driving me crazy and I almost took my pocket knife to it today. I don't know how I'm going to make it to July. On the plus side though, when I get out of the shower and slick it back I totally look like a serial killer.

4) Johnny English, you magnificent bastard.

Sunday, April 03, 2005


265) White Squall. Coming of age drama blah blah blah learn to work together as a crew blah blah blah terrible tragedy blah blah blah mold them into men blah blah blah...

266) Just Visiting. I will always have a special place in my heart for America's Sweetheart, Kelly Bundy, and I would also travel through time to touch Veronica Vaughn's heiney, so this was a no brainer.

267) Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday. As I near the end of theFriday the 13th run (Only Jason X remains) I almost feel a little sad. As stupid as they are, I've really looked forward to each one and even considered them rewards from time to time, like "If I watch enough crazy movies I've never heard of I can watch another Friday the 13th." I really want to go ahead and get Jaxon X but I also want to hold off for a little while so I can watch it when I'm kind of down on the whole thing and re-invigorate myself. We'll just see how long I hold out.

267 down, 733 to go.

Today was not the most productive of days, thank you very much Daylight's Savings Time. It's totally thrown off my whole sense of time and my sleeping patterns and I always freaking hate it every year. I did, however, bake a lovely lemon pie so that's a score, and Bree had on ANOTHER green shirt at the end of this week's episode so I was all happy about that. I'm starting The Barbarian and the Geisha and I'm sure I'll be able to stay awake for it since I'm not tired at all (curse you DST!) so I'll just put that in tomorrow's count.


260) Sin City. Sin City came along at about the same time I was growing more and more frustrated with the continual X-ification of the Marvel Comics Universe and, subsequently, comics all together. Cerebus kept my attention for awhile, but for the most part I lost interest in it around my sophomore year of college (shut up). As a result I missed out on all but the first Sin City stories and always wished I had kept up with them because Frank Miller has always been my favorite comic writer and The Hard Goodbye was absolutely incredible. I was both excited and anxious when I heard about the movie. Excited because I knew Miller wouldn't let something like this be made without his approval (especially after the studio butchering of his script for Robocop 2) and anxious because the artistic style of the comic was so unique and original that I was really afraid that simple black and white photography wouldn't do it justice. Miller's artwork wasn't so much drawings of characters or form as simple separation of light and shadow and it has a striking effect that works magnifecently for the stories being told. But my fears were totally unfounded as the artistic direction and casting were so well done that, at least for Marv's tale, the movie was truly the comic come to life. Anyway, this was just absolutely amazing and I can't wait for DVD so I can watch it again.

261) Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous. I have no problem admitting I liked the original. It was silly and predictable and all, but Bullock was cute enough to carry it all and the scripting was certainly good for the plot it had to work with, which is way more than I can say about the sequel. It was absolutely terrible and really had no business being made. Just awful.

262) Guess Who. I like Bernie Mac a lot, but he wasn't really on top of his comedic game in this. I got the feeling he was trying to tone down the Bernie Mac a little and be a "serious" actor, but it all worked out okay.

263) The Upside of Anger. The ending seemed abrupt and senseless, but for the most part I really loved this. And I figured I would because I like all the stars pretty well (even Costner, God bless me) and it totally restored my love for Keri Russell after we had a falling out over her increasing sluttiness at the end of Felicity's run.

264) Be Cool. I almost have the same problem with this that I had with Ocean's Twelve, in that it seemed like any semblance of a coherent storyline was secondary to a bunch of big name movie stars all being on the screen at the same time. Unlike Ocean's Twelve though, this actually had a story to be based on since Leonard really did write a sequel to Get Shorty so there were actually moments when there was a movie going on, but for the most part it seemed like throwing Travolta and Uma back onscreen together was enough for the producers. Decent, but nowhere near as good as Get Shorty. Oh well.

264 down, 736 to go.