...play me a song everyone knows...

...I bet you it's owned by Acuff-Rose...

259) Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World. I woke up about 9 and popped this in and was very impressed. I wish I could have seen it on the big screen now.

I'm headed to the theater in a few minutes. I started in on White Squall after Master and Commander but I'm not going to have time to finish it before I have to go.

259 down, 741 to go.

04-01-2005 For Real This Time

Okay, April Fool's. There was no viewing of porn, haha, I'm a stinker. But doesn't "Teenage Anal Princess" sound like an anime character? Anyway, Sarah and Charity wanted to go see Hitch but I feel very crippled right now and sitting in a movie theater seat for two hours isn't all that appealing. But I do plan on going tomorrow for Sin City, which I am quite excited about, and maybe hanging around for Be Cool and probably Miss Congeniality 2 (shut up).

257) How to Draw a Bunny. If the point of this was to show just how unknown Ray Johnson is by not really telling us anything about him, then job well done. Just a collection of anecdotes that really didn't add up to much. The cinematic equivalent of a bunch of guys sitting around in a bar talking about their much cooler friend who isn't there.

258) Way Out West. TCM was showing Laurel and Hardy pictures all day long for April Fools and luckily there was one I hadn't seen. Hysterical. Stan Laurel is, for my money, the best re-actor in the history of moving pictures.

258 down, 742 to go.

Robin called. She wants attention. She will not get it.

04-01-2005

257) 1 Night in Paris. Dude, Paris is so hot in this. I would give my right arm for a shot at her, so long as I lost the right arm afterwards.

258) Teenage Anal Princess #2. Nowhere near as good as the original. All of these whores were totally ugly.

258 down, 742 to go.

03-31-2005

255) Birthday Girl. Kidman was so sweet and cute at the beginning that I really resented the vicious turn the movie took. How dare you toy with my emotions in such a way!

256) The Hillz. Oh man. So since there was no OC tonight Sarah, Charity and I went and rented a movie and this looked so bad that it would be awesome, but it just turned out to be so bad. I for real think this guy just had a party one weekend and walked around with a video camera taping stupid stuff and making up the lines right there on the spot (okay Paris, now you go "But I love you!" and then you go "Stupid whore!" and then you go "I hate you!" and then you go "I'm sorry baby, I love you!" and then you go "Oh I love you so much I'm so sorry for hating you!" and etc.).

256 down, 744 to go.

That's A LOT of pee...

HP Giving Hurd $20 Million 'Golden Hello'

03-30-2005

252) Arsenic and Old Lace. Brilliant. If anyone is looking for ideas for my birthday (only 164 more shopping days!) ...

253) The White Sheik. More Fellini. Not my favorite. I think this might be one of those times where my judgement suffers from not being Italian or living in the 1950s cause I kind of get the feeling that the whole poking fun at the naive new wife infatuated with a soap star who is rudely awakened by the terrible truth of reality was high comedy at the time, but it just didn't work for me.

254) EXtreme Ops. Oh Veronica Vaugh. So eXtremely hot. Want to eXtremely touch the eXtreme heiney.


254 down, 746 to go.

03-29-2005

250) Fulltime Killer. All the gunplay but none of the flare of John Woo's Hong Kong movies. Kind of lame and I saw the big twist ending coming from a mile away. Whatever.

251) Betty. Pretty engaging story. The synopsis makes it sound like some sort of profound undertaking concerning the Parisian middle class and its seemy underbelly but it's really just a character study of one woman's life. I liked the whole start at the end and work back to the beginning device and thought it worked really well for the situation.

251 down, 749 to go.

No longer dissapointed update:
After UPS left today I was standing in the big door in the warehouse checking some stuff in when the Traci Lords look-a-like from across the street came out to go to lunch. She backed her car out and it made this awful noise and I thought she had dragged her bumper on the pavement or something but she pulled back in and got out and yelled over to me "Did you hear that?" and I was like "Yeah, did you hit something?" and she's like "I don't think so." So I walked over and there were a couple of rings on the street covered in axle grease and it looked like they had fallen out of her car so I tried to get underneath it but it was so low to the ground I couldn't really get under but I felt where something was busted (probably something from her steering) and she was all freaked out and called her boyfriend/husband so I was all "damn it" but anyway, standing there talking to her I realized I could totally get past the whole looking like Traci Lords thing because she is now in the top 3 of the most beautiful women I've seen in real life. And she seemed really nice, so now I'm totally in love with her. Anyway, she had to have her car towed so she got all of her stuff out of it and when her boyfriend/husband came to pick her up, he totally didn't help her carry any of it! Jerk.

03-28-2005

249) Das Bus. There were some pretty funny anecdotes and stuff, but in the end there just wasn't a whole lot of point to this. They tried to cram in some kind of political message about the necessity of mass transit for those that can't afford cars and some jive about "white flight" near the end and if they had maybe spent as much time working those angles as they did making funny little musical interludes (the choreographed bus driving scene? Five minutes of my life I'll never see again.) it might have been more interesting.

I'm beat, so I'm going to hop into bed and watch Fulltime Killer. I'm pretty sure I'll finish it, but I don't really know how long my eyes are going to stay open so it might have to get finished tomorrow night.

249 down, 751 to go.

03-27-2005

243) Used Cars. Looks like we got ourselves a convoy...

244) One Foot In Hell. I gotta have at least one western every weekend. This was REALLY good. Alan Ladd was a total freakshow by the end and the story was great.

245) Down With Love. If I had a nickel for every time vomit rose in my throat...

246) In America. It took me forever to realize the dad is the same guy that played Joy Division's manager in 24 Hour Party People. Anyway, this was so great. If I had normal human emotions I would have cried my freaking eyes out.

247) New York Minute. I'm totally down with whichever one doesn't have the eating disorder/drug problem. Now you can make a smartass comment about Lolita, whoever you are (Jana)!

248) From Justin to Kelly. I have never been more embarassed for a group of people in my whole life. I've also never laughed at the unintentional hilarity of a movie so hard in my whole life either. Awesome.

248 down, 752 to go

FINALLY a new Desperate Housewives. How cute was Bree with her little tennis outfit and pig tails? And at the end, with the green shirt? HER EYES! She should always have on green. I am so in love with her.

03-26-2005

236) Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan. Featuring a young Kelly Hu!

237) Above the Law. Cause when I think of Steven Segal the words "tough" and "sexy" always come to mind! Oh man, what a total laugh.

238) They Live By Night. I'm kind of weirded out by this one. For some reason it kept reminding me of Red Zone Cuba, but it was actually pretty good. I guess it was one of those studio contract B pictures that just happened to have some talent behind it.

239) Tension. That's two more off the film noir list today. This one was pretty good, but the whole "clever detective" voice over got old.

240) Lifeboat. One more Hitchcock off the list. What a great movie. The scene where the woman who lost her baby is freaking out and calling for him and the Nazi just yawns and lies down? Man...

241) National Treasure. Pretty ludicrous, but it kept it's pace pretty well and was enjoyable enough.

242) The Incredibles. I think I hit a new low when I caught myself checking out Elastigirl's ass...

242 down, 758 to go.