05-28-2005

403) Eye See You. So this was pretty entertaining. There wasn't a whole lot going on with the story and it flew by quickly, but I enjoyed it. I had heard it was one of those movies that didn't really get a fair shake at the theater, and I'd have to agree.

403 down, 597 to go.

Rough day. I went to work about 10 and painted all morning and then printed til 10:30 tonight for the SEC Baseball Tournament. I'm beat, I'm headed to the shower and then le bed.

05-27-2005

401) Harvard Man. Oh Sarah Michelle, why the dirtiness? Why? Why? WHY?!

402) Stephen King's Riding the Bullet. The cover featured a quote from King himself saying this was the best adaptation of one of his stories since Stand By Me, so I thought I'd give it a shot, but now I'm thinking that maybe they just made that up because this sucked so incredibly hard.

402 down, 598 to go.

I started in on Eye See You but had to break it off to attend the world premiere of Little Baby Girl (El)lie. Congratulations Steve and Donna.

05-26-2005

399) The Saint. Mostly I got this for Elisabeth Shue, who I've loved ever since her charming and adorable dance sequence from the beginning of Adventures of in Babysitting. And of course, she was smokingly hot-tastic as always. I never could make up my mind if this was supposed to be an "action-comedy" or what, because Kilmer kept hamming it up the whole time like it was and it made it seem really weird. Like I was maybe supposed to be laughing at him but not really because this is a serious spy movie but he's just so goofy that you have to laugh but don't you dare laugh because this isn't a comedy it's serious stuff blah blah blah.... Whatever.

400) Go Tigers!. Man, all I gotta say is these bitches better be glad they don't play Class 5A Alabama Football because Homewood would have shut their country asses down. Go Patriots!

400 down, 600 to go.

Sith related update:
After much careful consideration, I still thought it sucked. Sarah at Tomato Nation manages to put my exact feelings concerning Lucas's ineptitude at dealing with actors and dialogue into a far more detailed than I could ever stop being lazy for long enough to write review. And then there was this great giant poke at one of the worst scenes EVER so at least a little something good came out of it.

05-25-2005

397) Darkness. Imagine taking The Shining, The Amityville Horror, and a magical "bore you to freaking tears" potion, throwing them in a blender, and then assembling the chopped up footage into a new movie. That new movie would still be twice as good as this. HATRED.

398) Austin Powers in Goldmember. I'm not sure why I never got around to seeing this. I think I'm one of the few that liked The Spy Who Shagged Me enough to watch it more than once (or twice, or 20 times, but whatever) and I was really excited about this when it came out and then...I just forgot about it. Weird. So anyway, same sense of humor and I still laughed, because I am 8.

398 down, 602 to go.

05-24-2005

396) Scooby Doo. Man, I had forgotten how much I loved Scooby Doo. Me and MWOAEG used to stay up late and watch it on Cartoon Network all the time, but then came Adult Swim and I forgot about it. So yeah, Lillard was Shaggy, Cardellinin was totally Velma, the Scrappy Doo scene was hilarious, ROWAN ATKINSON and Sarah Michelle Gellar as Daphne parading around in short skirts and gogo boots?! Crap dude, it's like they filmed my dreams! Even the CG Scooby that I heard such terrible things about was fine. My only sticking point? Fred. I know that because he was the pretty boy and acted like the leader all the time even though it was usually Velma doing all the work in the cartoons he's always made fun of, but he was never the narcisistic jackass they make out to be in the movie. So that was kind of a lame thing to do. Otherwise, I am so down with this.

396 down, 604 to go.

05-23-2005

394) Eyes Wide Shut. Tom Cruise and sexual odyssey aren't typically two phrases I like to hear in a movie synopsis, but this and Barry Lyndon are the only two Kubrick's I haven't seen so here we go. For the most part I think Kubrick is the most overrated director of all time, but this really had my mesmerized through the whole thing and, much to my chagrin, I quite enjoyed it. The whole orgy scene was crazy messed up though, that part had me kind of uncomfortable. But overall, man. I'd kind of like to watch it again.

395) Rocketman. "Fun is my Chinese neighbor's middle name. " Genius.

395 down, 605 to go.

05-22-2005

389) The Naked City. Far too much city, not nearly enough naked. One more from the film noir list.

390) The Outriders. This was actually yesterday's TCM selection, but I worked for a few hours yesterday morning and had to tape it.

391) House on Haunted Hill. Veronica Vaughn, Famke Janssen, and Ali Larter. All in the same movie. How have I not seen this already?

392) Out of the Fog. Not the best gangster picture ever, it still feels like a play instead of a film adaption of a play, but Ida Lupino plays the wistful daughter instead of her usual gangster moll role and the change up was nice. Plus, she's hot.

393) Hollow Man. Will somebody please give Paul Verhoeven a decent script? It's always hard seeing such visual mastery wasted on poor storytelling.

393 down, 607 to go.

05-21-2005

384) Rudy. I'm a little embarassed to say I've never seen this, but it's just one that I've never gotten around to. I mean, why would anyone want to play for Notre Dame so badly? Just kidding, it was the 70s when they actually won from time to time, and it really was kind of heart warming and I did get a little choked up, not because Rudy finally got to play, it's just always fun to see a Georgia Tech quarterback being sacked.

385) The Negotiator. I remember there being a big fuss over this before it was released but then I don't think it was in theaters for too long. Anyway, overly long in parts, but definetely well done. We're okay.

386) Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. Maybe a small part of me was hoping this was going to be awesome and make me forgot about the other two, but mostly I saw it for the closure. I mean, come on. How do you go from debating which of the three is the best (Empire, baby!) to which of the three sucked the least (Not sure, really). I don't even know what to say, it's like even my dorkiness can't overcome the terrible let down. I've seen the original trilogy over 200 times, I read the books, I read the comics, I know what the model number of the Millenium Falcon is and knew that Bail Organa's ship is the same as Princess Leia's blockade runner, which, by the way, is called a Corellian Corvette. I know all the lame and stupid trivia you can know about the original trilogy because for some reason it inspired that kind of obsessive devotion in me. But the prequels are just lame and stupid and it's like Lucas finally decided to get around to making them after claiming he already had them written years ago and realized that he could do whatever he damn well pleased, including forget his own mythology when scripting and foisting the likes of Jar Jar Binks upon us, and as long as it had "Star Wars" in the title us stupid losers would shell out our money and let him plop any old turd he wants to on us and we'd probably grumble for a little while but we'd hold out that hope that the next one would be better and it would all be worth it and when they came out we'd line up and pay our money all over again. And he was right. But now there won't be any next one and none of it was worth it. My eyes damn near rolled out of my head through the whole thing (it was bad enough having 3PO and R2 being built by Anakin, but now Chewie makes a cameo? Give me a fucking break) and I sit here all bitter that I can't at least retreat back into the fuzzy cocoon of A New Hope and forget all about them.

388) Urban Legends: The Final Cut. This might be the best idea for a sequel ever, or possibly the worst. I can't really make up my mind. On the one hand, it would be stupid to try to carry on the events of the first one so taking the same premise and transporting it into a different situation and even turning the events of the first into an urban legend in this one are clever ways to continue the franchise. On the other hand, there wasn't really a point to having a sequel and this could have been a decent enough slasher picture on its own without trying to tie in some lame "urban legend" storyline.

388) The Tuxedo. Oh that Jackie. When will he learn?

388 down, 612 to go.