06-15-2005

453) The Day After Tomorrow. What complete and total crap! I was on my feet yelling at this almost as much as I was at Haiku Tunnel, and that's a whole lot people! First off, Dennis Quaid said it himself, this exact thing happened 10,000 years ago which I think, THINK, might have been before the industrial revolution when evil and dirty mankind started dumping all those awful pollutants into the air. Second, and I'm just going from a rudimentary knowledge of basic 11th grade ecology and all of the boring Discovery Channel documentaries you can think of here, it would take YEARS AND YEARS AND FUCKING YEARS for the earth to cool enough for a new ice age! Third, and this is the part that really got me going, if you are trapped in a library trying to survive a monster blizzard, why are you only burning books? Because as handy as they might be in getting the fire going I'm pretty sure that libraries have other sources of fuel in them. I mean, it has been a while since I was in one, but I seem to recall tables and chairs and SHITLOADS OF BOOKSHELVES ALL MADE OUT OF WOOD! WOOD THAT BURNS LONGER AND HOTTER THAN PAPER! BREAK UP THE FURNITURE AND BURN THE FUCKING SHELVES! BURN THE TABLES AND THE CHAIRS AND ALL OF THOSE BILLIONS OF SHELVES! FOR THE FREAKING LOVE, BURN THE SHELVES!!!!!!!!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But then again Sela Ward was in it, so I guess it's a wash.

454) Ballistic: Ecks Vs. Sever. Okay, if your name is Wych Kaosayananda then "Kaos" is both an appropriate and kind of cool nickname. But if you choose to have it as your director's credit? DOUCHE BAG. And I thought calling yourself McG was the stupidest thing ever...

454 down, 546 to go.